DEVELOPING A REALISTIC SELF-IMAGE
To be a confident person we need to have a balanced view of ourselves, not an over-inflated ego, nor an inferior complex.
1. FACTORS THAT AFFECT OUR SELF-IMAGE:
Appearances, abilities (how we view ourselves),
Significant other’s view (parents, relatives, teachers, spouse, partner, friends, etc),
Environment (where we came from, social class, school, Uni. Etc.)
Achievements or Lack of achievements. Effect of success or failure, or perceived sin (Greek word for failure is ἁμαρτία, which means "to miss the mark" or "to err")
2. APPEARANCE:
Have we recently taken a good, unbiased look at ourselves in a mirror? Someone coined the phrase “warts and all”?
We need to set aside what other’s have said about our looks, that is their opinion not yours, forget the photo’s and the comparisons. Be realistic.
Our natural reaction is to focus on the negatives and, yes, that is necessary but note them on your “to-do” list e.g. “I really need a haircut” or “that colour does not suit me”. Etc
We can look at ourselves with interest, curiosity, and affirmation.. ”this is me, how can I be the best me?”
3. ABILITIES:
What have we achieved? The TV is filled with celebrities who have achieved great things, and we stand in danger of feeling that we have contributed nothing, Fame and fortune are not the criteria for achievement. These are to be applauded, yes, but there are other hugely significant achievements that are often not recognised. What about the parents, teachers, mentors etc. of the great achievers? Unrecognised, yet significant.
4. IMPROVING OURSELVES:
Don’t criticise yourself. Be kind, compassionate, caring and realistic about yourself.
Deal with guilt. This is the prime source of self-condemnation. Note the wisdom from the bible “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purity us from all unrighteousness.” (I John 1:9) Let it go with the determination to do better.
Acknowledge your successes and have gratitude for those who contributed to your success.
Face the future with excited anticipation.
Don’t be afraid to call on God for help (remember when the disciple Peter tried to walk on water? On his own he was sinking but with the help of Jesus he could do the impossible…walk on water!))
Realise that nothing can separate, you and I, from the love of God. (Romans 8:37-39) and develop a personal relationship with God. He is our loving Heavenly Father. God knew us and formed us before our birth (Psalm 139) God loves and values us (John 3:16, Romans 5:7 & 8)
God has plans for us (Ephesians 1:3-5)
God has an aim for our lives (John 13:34 & 35)
